On Press the Meat this week, first up is Michael “The Cryptkeeper” Chertoff, on to tell us how dubya singlehandedly thwarted the car bomb attack in London (apparently by spreading ignorance throughout the world). Then it’s an “exclusive” with Pat Leahy, on to talk about “the subpoenas.” Plus, it’s a roundtable with this week’s token black guy, Tavis Smiley (fresh off his debate performance), David Brody, on to represent God, Chuck “The Schmuck” Todd, and Judy “I’m not Andrea Mitchell” Woodruff. Whoopie.

Over at CBS, Bush Buddy Bobby Schieffer hosts Dick Lugar (I always thought the Dick Lugar was the preferred sidearm of the Dick Armey), on to talk about his dramatic stand against the preznit, as long as it doesn’t actually involve doing anything that matters. Wow, Dick, what courage you have. You’re right up there with Colin Powell and Robert McNamara.

On Fux News Sunday, the Cryptkeeper rides again, plus wingnut talk show host Mike Gallagher squares off against good old Mark Green of something called Air America Radio. Wasn’t there once a brilliant radio network with the same name?

At the Goebbels network, Cryptkeeper Chertoff makes another appearance, and then the even scarier and less lifelike Joey Lieberman wil be on to stick a knife in the back of every sane American. At the roundtable, it’s he WaPost’s Ruth Marcus, Batsht Crazy Bay Buchanan, Donna “Loser” Brazile and Cokie “The Hag” Roberts. And then James Earl Jones is on to answer the question, “who’s scarier, Darth Vader or the aptly named Dick Cheney.”

Over at CNN, Wolf Blitzer’s Late Emission will give you yet another look at the Cryptkeeper, plus other criminals, including Henry “isn’t he dead yet?” Kissinger.

Later, on 60 Minutes, do you give a shit about Russel Crowe? Me neither, but apparently Steve Kroft does. Bob Simon does a cheery little story about the Rwandan genocide, and Scott Pelley tells us how medical advances are saving soldiers in Iraq that otherwise would have died, so they can come home and get fucked over by the Bush Administration, who really couldn’t give a flying fuck about them, unless they need a compliant backdrop for one of dummy’s speeches. I’m pretty sure these are all repeats, but I rarely watch the show, so I can’t be certain.

Then it’s (last week’s) Big Love at eight, and Dexter at nine. Enjoy your Sunday, and Happy July.