I hope you don’t have to go to work today. I’m certainly glad I don’t. I postponed all my usual exciting Sunday activities (laundry, charge my cell phone, etc.) to today.

Kinda cold here, but I won’t bitch about it, ‘cuz I know it’s even colder for you Minnesohtuns. And just north of here, they’re getting three to six feet (yeah, they measure it in feet up there) of snow, while we don’t have much of anything at all here.

Didn’t watch any football yesterday, but I saw the friggin’ Patriots won again. I’m pretty sick of them. Didn’t catch the score of the Giants game, but hopefully they, at least, managed to win. Probably not, though. Nobody I want ever seems to win these days.

Speaking of which, there was John Edwards. Here’s what he had to say yesterday:

“I got my butt kicked. That is what happened in Nevada,” the former North Carolina senator told Wolf Blitzer on CNN’s Late Edition. “And the job for me now is — I have learned this from my whole life experience, is when you get knocked down, you have got to get up. You have got to get up and start fighting again…

Well, I like the sentiment, at least. And I hope he continues to be a pain in Clintama’s ass from now until the goddamn convention.

One thing you can say about Nevada – at least they get their shit over with early. And what a huge, huge victory it was for Hillary, as she raked in a whopping 12 delegates. Obama was a distant second with, um, 13 (do we really elect people this way?). Edwards, sadly, got zilch. The Obama true believers are in quite a quandary. They hate Edwards, and want him to go away. But the most recent conventional wisdom says Edwards is “stealing” votes from Hillary. So now they don’t know what to think. Fortunately, in this country, you don’t need to know what to think, ‘cuz every Sunday there’s a bunch of talking heads right there on your teevee to tell you.

For instance, on Press the Meat today, Timmy Potatohead hosts a gaggle of very serious experts ready to shit out conventional wisdom all hour long. There’s presidential historian Doris Kearns Goodwin, Newsweek editor and Bush administration shill Jon Meacham, Peggy Noonan (always ready to felate the dead body of Ronald Reagan), Tom Brokaw and NPR’s Meeeshell Norris. Whoopie.

Faze the Nation is apparently still looking for a webmaster. Maybe I should apply.

Over at Fux News Sunday, Weaselface Wallace will be Star Fuxing Mannequin Mitt Romney, fresh off his big win in Nevada, and then Chuck Schumer will pop in. Plus, it’s those zany Fux News panelists, including Brit Hume Cronyn, liberal NY Times columnist Bill Kristol, and the usual Fux News NPR whores, Juan Williams and Mara Liasson.

At the Goebbels Network, George Snufalufagus has everybody’s favorite old Italian grandmother, Guidi Ruliani (why these people continue to insist on pretending that Mr. 911 is even slightly relevant, is beyond me; he’s got less juice than Grandpa Fred), and the ever-entertaining Charlie Rangel. Then it’s a roundtable of Bush-Cheney campaign mastermind, Matthew Dowd,the Nation’s Katrina vanden Heuvel, Chrystia Freeland of the Financial Times (one of many women to be insulted by Chris Matthews) and of course the very serious George :jerk: Will.

On CNN’s Late Edition, U-Boat commander Wolf Blitzer has John Edwards. We should get a pool going to see how many times Wolf asks him when he’s gonna drop out.

Later, on 60 Minutes, there will be no 60 Minutes. Instead, it will be “The Age Of Warming,” where Scott Pelley goes to the poles to watch them melt, and talks to NASA’s top scientist studying climate, who says the Bushies have restricted what he can say about global warming. Which everybody who’s been even slightly paying attention already knows about. Maybe it’ll finally sink in to the rest of the people out there.

Nah.

Have a good one.

So, today’s the big Republican South Carolina primary. Huckabee, vs. The Saint. Whoopdie freakin’ doo.

They keep reporting the polls and primary results in terms of percentages, as if that means anything. I wish they’d figure out the delegate counts and report what those are projected to be, based on the polls. I mean, for the Dems, SC has 54 delegates (CA has 411; so why are we so concerned with little states like Iowa, SC, and NH?).

Anyhow, if the polls today are close (big if, and there’s still a week to go in SC), that would mean (and I’m not sure about how many are committed or uncommitted and how many are up for grabs based on the vote, but whatever) 22 for Obama, 17 for Clinton, 7 for Edwards, and 8 undecided (give or take).

But guess what? There are 4,049 total delegates to be awarded, and it takes 2,025 to win the nomination. The primaries and caucuses select 3,253, the other 796 are “unpledged,” and can vote whatever way the wind’s blowing.

Even if the “frontrunner” gets all the unpledged delegates, they’d still need 1,229 of the delegates up for grabs – or about 38%. Any combination of pledged or unpledged delegates for all other candidates combined that adds up to 62% of the total, and nobody wins on the first ballot. Now, some states – Missouri, for instance – are winner take all, but most of them aren’t, so, really, winning by a “huge” 10% margin doesn’t mean all that much in terms of delegate count.

But that’s not the way the media reports it. They talk about momentum and “big leads” that don’t mean squat. And they’ll be pushing Edwards to drop out (if they mention him at all). And, in the end, we’ll probably get Obama or Clinton vs. McCain. The media loves McCain, so they’ll shove his maverick, straight talkin’ sainthood down our throats, and between that and the rigged voting system, guess what we’ll wind up with?

It’s Friday. I guess I should be excited. Hell, it’s even a three-day weekend. But I’m too damn tired to be excited, and the latest poll numbers for the South Carolina primary don’t look so good (not surprising; nobody I want ever wins). So I’m just gonna try to slide through the day, and then maybe take a nap ’til Tuesday.

I’m sorry, I just can’t deal with Obama being preznit. I want to like him, really I do. I’d love to see this country elect a black guy whose middle name is Hussein to the presidency. Not only would it maybe – just maybe – give the families of all the Iraqis we’ve butchered the hope that the Bush years were just a horrible abomination and we want to do the right thing, but it would really piss off all the racists and Kristofascists out there. It might even make Michael Wiener Savage’s head explode, and how could that be a bad thing?

I’d love to love Hillary, for that matter, but I just can’t. It would be great for this country to have a woman president – and way past due time. We should’ve elected a woman a long time ago (but then, women weren’t even able to vote not that long ago, let alone run for office).

And I’d also very much be happy to be totally opposed to the good looking (hell, I’m a straight guy, and even I can tell he’s good-lookin’), rich, white lawyer.

But, I’ll tell ya, Obama just seems like another Republican to me. For him to evoke the name of Reagan during a Democratic Presidential Primary campaign – equating Reagan with the “great presidents” who evoked fundamental change in this country – well, it just really seals the deal against him for me. For chrissakes, Reagan all but destroyed unions – between disbanding the Air Traffic Controllers and loading the NLRB up with anti-union cronies, he set the labor movement back 80 years – ignored AIDS, allowing tens – even hundreds – of thousands of Americans to die without so much of a thought, supported Apartheid while denouncing Nelson Mandela, illegally sold weapons to the “terror” state of Iran in order to finance the Contras, took Jimmy Carter’s solar panels off the White House, and, well, I gotta go to work, and can’t possible list all of Reagan’s sins in so short a time, but the point is, praising Reagan is a kick in the teeth to anybody that cares about what’s right for the average person, or the world.

And, I don’t mind that Obama was dissing Bill Clinton, either. There’s a hell of a lot of things I didn’t like about the Clinton Administration. But, for a Republican, Bill was a pretty good president. And whether or not it was because of anything he did, you gotta admit, the Clinton years were pretty goddamn good (at least compared to the last seven or so).

If Bush is the guy you want to have a beer with, it’s not because you like him. It’s because his old man’s rich, and he’ll pay. For the price of that beer, you have to put up with his arrogant bullshit, and his annoyingly stupid “humor.” Bill is more like that crude guy who constantly boasts of his conquests in great, vulgar detail, even if they aren’t exactly good looking – giggity, giggity, giggity (that was for you, Andy) – but that you can’t help but like, in spite of yourself.

But, let’s face it. The Democrats aint had but two wins since 1980, and both of those were Bill Clinton. And you bring up Reagan as one of the greats? Kiss my ass, Barack! Talk FDR or Truman or Kennedy. But Reagan?

Save Reagan for when you pander to the GOP in the General Election, if you must.

Personally, I prefer Edwards. But, while I don’t trust Hillary, I feel like I know her, and I think I know what moves her (cold political calculation; I think she can be forced to do the right thing, but you gotta keep a close eye on her). Obama? I think he’s a slightly darker shade of Joe Lieberman. I don’t trust him one bit.

There’s an old saying: An honest politician is one who stays bought.

I don’t trust Obama to stay bought.

I didn’t pay a bit of attention to what went on in Michigan last night. It was fairly meaningless on the Democrat’s side. Supposedly, a lot of people wanted to see Romney win, just to keep him in. Personally, I don’t give a crap what these people do anymore. I’m just too damn tired these days.

Today isn’t a holiday, but it ought to be, because today is my dad’s birthday. He’d have been 88 today, and he’s been gone for over 14 years now. There isn’t a day that goes by without me thinking of him, and I’ve always thought it was a shame he never met my wife and my dog. He’d have really liked the dog. 😉

It’s also Martin Luther King Jr’s birthday. We won’t celebrate it until Monday, but it’s certainly worth thinking about him today. It’s no secret that I consider Barack Obama a bit of a pandering, empty suit. But the fact than a black guy is a serious contender for president of the United States shows how far we’ve come since April 4th, 1968. Not far enough, as the recent bickering has made clear, and certainly not fast enough. But a long way nonetheless.

Happy Tuesday.

So, another week begins. I guess the best part of the weekend would have to be the Giants beating Dallas yesterday. It’s not that I’m a big Giants fan (though I don’t dislike them; unfortunately, I’m cursed with being a Jets fan. Damn you Joe Namath!!), but I’ve long despised the Cowboys. I feel about them the same way I feel about Notre Dame.

Otherwise, two days once again flew by in a wink, and not even the spectacle of the Obama-Cinton cat fight brought much joy. My hope is that they claw each other to pieces and John Edwards rushes in to fill the void. Not much chance of that with the traditional media haven chosen to ignore him entirely (except to sneer at his hair or call him “angry”). But, one can hope.

OK, let’s get this over with.

Whoopdie-doo, it’s Sunday. And Sunday makes me think of…. Well, let’s not get into that again.

Anyhow, on Press the Meat today, it’s the show that Fred’s been waiting for all year. Yes, a full hour with Hillary Clinton. I wonder if Timmy Potatohead will ask her if she’s sorry for staying married to her husband? Personally, I hope Hillary makes Timmy cry.

Since Faze the Nation can’t be bothered to update its website, I really can’t be bothered to try and figure out who’s on this week.

Over at Fux News Sunday, though, it’s the show all you ladies have been waiting for: the one, the only, that hunka hunka chunka burning Big Apple, Mr. Nine-One-One himself, Guidi Ruliani. He’ll be on to tell Weaselface Wallace all about 9/11, and how strong and marvelous he (Guidi) was on that day. And, of course, the really despicable Brit Hume an Bill Kristol, along with the relatively disgusting Juan Williams and Mara Liasson.

At Goebbels, George Snufalufagus boasts a double exclusive with the two most relevant men in politics: John Kerry and Newt Gingrich. Then there’s a roundtable with the WaPost’s EJ “Poupon” Dionne, news hacks Mr. and Mrs. Jay Shipman-Carney, and of course the man with no place else to go, George :jerk: Will.

Wolf Blitzer’s Late Emission is fair and balanced today, with John Edwards balancing out the empty suit Republican contingent of Magic Underpants Mitt Romney, Grampa Fred Thompson, and Huckleberry Huckabee. Plus, it’s Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee, Tom Daschle, and Abdul Qadir al-Obeidi (Iraqi Defense Minister; how’d the hell he get in there).

Later, on 60 Minutes, Lesley Stahl talks to the 23 year old founder of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, who is supposedly worth $3 billion (for which, I officially hate him). Bob Simon tells us how we’re fishing bluefin tuna into exticntion, just so we can eat sushi (aka, “bait”). And Anderson Cooper tells us how rape has becoming one of the central weapons in the civil in the Congo.

All that, and a new episode of The Wire, too. Enjoy, y’all.

So, Larry O’Donnell thinks John Edwards is a “loser” who ought to quit, lest he be remembered as a white guy who stood in the way of the black guy being preznit. Bill O’Reilly thinks he ought to be on the Supreme Court. And the wingnuts were calling for the apocalypse, thanks to a prankster nicknamed the “Filipino Monkey.”

Oh well, at least it’s Saturday.