Hey, shouldn’t you be out buying useless crap from China that you don’t need? I have no idea why anybody would fight the crowds when you can throw you money away from the privacy of your own home in the Internet. Speaking of which, do UPS and DHL deliver today? My new showshoes and “Dead Space” have made it to town. One for if we get snow, and one for if we don’t.

Oops, gotta go. There’s a Blue Light Special in aisle #3.