I’m not feeling particularly inspired this morning. Monday after a three-day weekend (a spectacular one, weather-wise, though pretty lame on the sports front) will do that to you, I guess. So will looking at the faces of the Republican Party in the post-booblehead show wrap-ups. I mean, there’s a reason I don’t watch these things on Sunday, do you really have to shove them in my face on Monday? First there’s the truly disgusting Guidi Ruliani (I know you straight gals and gay guys think he’s hot – especially in the Marilyn outfit – but he makes me sick; look up putrefaction in the dictionary, and you’ll see his maggoty picture). Yesterday, he told the world that trying criminals in US Courts was “giving them an advantage,” and that it’s just too darn dangerous for NYC to try them there (though I guess at least a couple of hosts called him out for his 2006 praise of the civilian trial of Zacarias Moussaoui, when he said he was “in awe of our system” and that we “are a nation of law”). I mean, I thought DA-types were supposed to get all moist an dewy over bringing criminals to trial. And when will people finally realize what a bunch of f*cking cowards and hypocrites Republicans are?

Then there’s chinless ferret-face f*ck Mitch McConnell, who officially announced that the Republicans will just be trying to delay health care reform as long as possible. Between the idiotic rules of the Senate (that Democrats were too feeble to use when they were in the minority), assholes like Joe Lieberman, corrupt schmucks like Max Baucus, and the feckless wonder that is Harry Reid, I have no doubt they’ll be able delay reform until President Palin is sworn in on January 20, 2013.

As if that thought isn’t scary enough, the evil spawn of evil, Liz Cheney (rumor has it that she was conceived on a dark and stormy night in November of 1965, after daddy Dick got himself off watching torture porn, and his spattered black spunk coalesced and crawled up the steps from his basement dungeon, slithered up Lynne’s leg – nestling itself in her icy nether regions, patiently waiting to hatch nine months later) ventures on Fux News that her daddy would make a great candidate in 2012 (they have her sister Mary’s kid for spare parts, after all), and would never bow to those low-down dirty chinks.

Great choice: Lucifer, or Alaska trailer trash.

Speaking of trailer trash, I’m somewhat dismayed to find myself agreeing with David Brooks – at least with his opinion of Sarah Palin, who he called “a joke.” How much do you wanna bet he changes his tune and says he admires her fresh, plain-spoken, no-nonsense “outside the box” thinking when she takes the Iowa caucuses? Brooks went on to say

I mean, I just can’t take her seriously. We’ve got serious problems in the country…. The idea that this potential talk show host is considered seriously for the Republican nomination — believe me, it’ll never happen. Republican primary voters are just not going to elect a talk show host.

No, of course not. A fake cowboy who’s afraid of horses and lives on a pretend ranch? You betcha. And a crappy “B” move actor with Alzheimer’s who runs the nation based on the advice of his dessicated wife’s astrologer and sells weapons to the Axis of Evil in order to illegally fund a bunch of civilian-butchering “revolutionaries?” Oh, hell, all he’d be is just the new Republican messiah – the standard by which all future Republicans would be measured.

But a talk show host? Never.