Looks like the snow has tapered off, here (still coming down some, though). We’re still a little bit below average for the season, but with the 14+ inches we got yesterday (not much compared to “up north” where they got 42), and what we got on Saturday, we’re catching up. It was kind of nice to get the shovel working again. I’d rather shovel snow all day long than go to an airport, that’s for sure. This guy at Newark certainly caused quite a commotion, didn’t he? You’d think they’d have somebody keeping a closer eye on the exits, wouldn’t you?

Why dogs are better than cats, Reason #4237: Cougar Attacks. Yep, it you’re out getting firewood and a cougar (which is just a big damn cat) attacks, you stand a much better chance of surviving if you have a dog. It’s very rare that you see “cat saves boy from wild animal attack” headlines. If you’re stupid enough to mess with a bull, though, you’re on your own.

Brit Hume says Tiger Woods needs to become a Christian if he wants to get through all this sex scandal stuff. That’s because when it comes to deceit and betrayal, nobody does it as well as Christians do. It’s pretty much what it’s founded on. Well, that and torture. Judas betrays Jesus, Peter betrays Jesus by denying to be one of his followers (he got his later, though, when the Romans crucified him upside-down), and of course even Jesus’ “father” betrayed him on the cross.

The other thing is that Christians have an external locus of control. They may blather on about how God gave us free will, but when push comes to shove, just say you accept Jesus Christ as your savior, the devil made you do it, and you’re really, really sorry. That’s only if you get caught, though. Otherwise, you can do whatever the hell you want.

Just make sure you’ve repented by May, 2011. That’s when the end of the world is coming, according to “bible scholar” Harold Camping. He’s got a mathematical “system” worked out to interpret biblical prophecies, and he’s crunched the numbers. It’s all over on May 21, 2011. Of course, he also said Armageddon was coming on Sep 6, 1994 (whoopsies), but he’s refined his system, and this time he’s definitely got it.

It’s, like, really scientific, too. You see, the number 5 equals “atonement.” Never mind “why,” it just does. Ten is “completeness.” Seventeen = “heaven.” Furthermore, Christ hung on the cross April 1, 33 A.D. (must be the origin of “April Fool’s Day.” So, if you go to April 1 of 2011 A.D., that’s 1,978 years. Why go to 1/1/11? Beats me. But if you multiply 1,978 by 365.2422 days in a year and then add 51 (which is the number of days between April 1 and May 21 (OK, not really sure where May 21 comes from, but anyways) it equals 722,500. Well, clearly, (5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500. Or (Atonement x Completeness x Heaven), squared.

No way you can argue with that – it’s math.

But I still better get out there and shovel the driveway.