Press the Meat has House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer (D-Md.) and Minority Leader Papa John Boehner (R-Ohio), as well as the two national party chairmen – Democrat Tim Kaine and Republican Michael “Bozo the Clown” Steele. Former White House Communications Director Anita Dunn takes part in the roundtable.

On the Goebbels network, it’s Eric Cantor (R-Va.) and John Larson (D-Conn.). Also David Plouffe, Nazi dough boy Karl Rove, Trent Lott of Mississippi, and former Senate Democratic Leader Tom Daschle of South Dakota.

Faze the Nartion has Reps. James Clyburn (D-S.C.), and Chris Van Hollen (D-Md.), along with ferret face Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) and Sen. Dick Durbin (D-Ill.).

On Fux News Sunday, Weaselgface Wallace talks to Reps. Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) and Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D-Fla.), plus Krazy John Cornyn of Texas.

On CNN, Farred Zakaria discusses Israel and what its ambassador to Washington calls the crisis in its relations with the United States of America. On board is Mort Zuckerman who just met with Prime Minister Netanyahu, and Martin Indyk, who has served as Ambassador to Israel twice and ran the Middle East division at the State Department as well as the National Security Council.

Plus, Michael Lewis continues making the rounds, hawling his book on the financial crisis and Wall Street’s dying empire.

It’s a basketball kinda weekend. Cornell became the first Ivy League team to win an NCAA tourney game in something like 12 years, hopefully keeping a few people from throwing themselves into the gorge for a day or two. It’s also the NYS high school final four, with my old high school taking on – of all teams – Red Hook this morning. Granny is down in DC marching to “celebrate” the Iraq War anniversary. No marching in my immediate future; I’m just trying not to walk. In fact, I’m starting to wonder if I’ll ever be able to walk normally again. It’s kind of discouraging, really. Tomorrow the focus shifts briefly back to health care reform with a big vote looming in the House. Then it’s back to basketball before having to deal with going back to work on Monday. The Vernal Equinox kicks in at 1:32 P.M. EDT this afternoon. Happy Spring!

Sorry to hear about Fess Parker passing away. The whole Injun FIghtin’ Davey Crockett fad was a little before my time, but I was big fan of Dan’l Boone, and his Russian Jew “Indian” sidekick, Mingo (Ed Ames, aka Edmund Dantes Urick). And they let Fess wear his Davey Crockett coonskin cap, too, which was nice.

Tough day yesterday for the Big East, with a bunch of teams going down in the first round. So far, so good in my “Pick With Your Heart” bracket, where you’re required to pick SU as the National Camp, and you got a 10-point bonus for picking Georgetown to lose in the first round (which they rather conveniently managed to do). Hopefully Syracuse won’t lose tonight, since this has already been a shitty enough week for me.

Big weekend for health care reform, supposedly. Republicans are now saying that Democrats hate God, because they had one vote on Christmas Eve, and are planning to hold another one on “a Sunday during Lent,” which of course is clearly prohibited under the Constitution.

Oh well, been doing a lot of sleeping lately. These crutches are killing my arm pits, plus it’s pretty hard to actually carry much of anything while using them. Kinda sucks.

Not a whole lot to say this morning. I can’t seem to walk, so it looks like I’ll have to go to the Urgent Care this morning, and see if they can figure out what the problem is. Or at least give me some good drugs. I’m also willing to consider amputation at this point. If that doesn’t work, I might have to drive down to Cornell and throw myself into the gorge.

There are a couple of big votes coming up today here in NY State, neither of which have anything to do with me. First off, there’s a special election to fill the seat left vacant when the NYS Senate expelled Hiram Monserrate in conjunction with his conviction for slashing his girlfriend’s face. Of course, Hi’s running for his old seat, so it’ll be interesting to see if voters in the NY’s 13th district return him to office or not. He’s running against NYS Assemblyman Jose Peralta, who has been endorsed by pretty much all the Democrats and lefties in NY (mostly, I think, because he’s yet to be convicted of anything). He’s also a supporter of marriage equality, which is appropriate, since he’d be representing Queens.

Also today, the village of Seneca Falls votes on whether or not to dissolve and be absorbed into the town that surrounds it (which is also named Seneca Falls). The village is probably best known as the birthplace of the women’s rights movement, having held the first documented women’s rights convention in 1848. It’s also the home of the National Women’s Hall of Fame and the Women’s Rights National Historic Park.

Seneca Falls was also an abolitionist hotspot, and the home of Amelia Bloomer, who popularized the women’s garments know today as – you guessed it – “bloomers” (though they were actually invented by Elizabeth Smith Miller of Peterboro, NY – another big abolitionist hotspot – and Fabrizia Flynn, who women can also thank for the galvanized rubber girdle).

Plus, it (Seneca Falls, not the girdle) was the inspiration for Frank Capra’s Bedford Falls (you know, from “It’s a Wonderful Life”).

Oh, there’s more, but I’m afraid it’ll just have to wait for another day, ‘cuz it’s getting late and is time for me to hit the road.

It’s funny, but yesterday felt more like we fell back an hour to me. The day seemed to last a long time – which is pretty unusual for a Sunday (especially one where I actually got some things accomplished). Today is making up for it, though, as I feel like somebody set the clock ahead by about five hours. I feel all kinds of crappy and tired, and am wondering just how the hell I’m gonna make it through the day. I also managed to gouge a nice chunk of flesh out of the inside of my elbow (is there an actual term for that part of one’s anatomy) in one of those “oh, I guess that wasn’t the last step on the ladder” things. It’s kind of annoying, since the skin seems to magically heal itself when my arm is bent, only to be torn apart again when I straighten it.

There doesn’t seem to be much going on in the news this morning. We’re mad at Israel, but not to worry. I’m sure it’s just a lover’s spat, and soon we’ll kiss and make up. They say we’re gonna get a health care reform law this week. Yeah, OK. I’ll believe it when I see it. Though I will say that the relentless onslaught of anti-reform ads seems to have ended. Haven’t seen one this morning (yet). That may be a sign that this is finally over. That, and l’il Lindsey Graham being in a petulant frenzy over the Democrats deigning to pass legislation in a “sleazy” manner. I think Lindsey needs a tickle hug.

Of course, we’ve all heard by now that Peter Graves passed away. To many (especially old people), he’s best known as the host of “Biography.” To people my age, he is, of course, both Jim Phelps and the pilot – Captain Clarence Oveur – from the “Airplane” movies (released, ironically, the same year that SU was last a #1 seed in the NCAA hoops tourney; note that I can tie pretty much anything to Syracuse with very little effort). I don’t think Victor ever did tell him what their vector was.

My favorite scene from Airplane is when Lloyd Bridges brings his kid to work and lets him clear planes for takeoff. Or do I have that mixed up with another movie?

Peter Graves was also the kid brother of James Arness (best known, of course, as “The Thing” in Howard Hawks’ “The Thing from Another Planet” – not to be mistaken for Thing T. Thing from the Addams Family [whose home design may or may not have been inspired by this building on the SU campus, which Charles Addams would have seen as a Colgate student when attending SU/Colgate football games, which was a big rivalry back in the day; see? told ya], played by Ted Cassidy, which is why you never saw Lurch and Thing together, and also starring Jackie Coogan, whose father was born in Syracuse [see how easy it is?] as Uncle Fester – later remade by John Carpenter, and starring, among others, Wilford Brimley, who later went on to be famous for gettin’ the diabeetus).

In perhaps his finest work, Peter Graves starred as Dr. Douglas Martin in “Killers from Space,” which – along with several other of his movies – can be seen on The Film Crew and MST3K). For me, I’ll always remember Graves as that dirty, no-good Nazi spy in Stalag 17 (directed by Billy Wilder, brother of W. Lee Wilder, who directed Graves in Killers from Space, and also starring William Holden, who escaped from the Nazis and then went on to blow up the bridge on the river Kwai).

Oh, I spoke too soon. There goes another anti-HCR ad. A good reason to go to work, I guess.

Yesterday blew. Literally. We didn’t get the heavy rain they had elsewhere in the Northeast, but we damn sure got the wind. Lots of folks without power around here, though we, fortunately, were spared. Good thing we didn’t get the rain, since, with the warm weather last week, all our snow is pretty much gone and things are pretty mooshy around here as it is. We have lots of tree bits down in the back yard, and I’m pretty sure I saw somebody fly by on a bicycle with a little dog in the front basket. Speaking of dogs, the receding snow at the park has left the chewed, rotting corpses of tennis balls strewn about, along with melting piles of dog crap. This is the ugly time of year up here. The trees have no leaves, and the nice, pretty snow is gone, exposing all the leftover road dirt.

Yesterday really rocked, too, if you live in Indonesia, where either a 7.0 or 6.4 earthquake (depending on who you listen to) hit, or if you live in Japan, which got hit by a 6.6. Indonesia, Japan, Chile, Haiti…. If one didn’t know better, one might think the Earth is starting to pull itself apart. And it’s not even 2012 yet.

Jim Bunning might be a crazy, demented old man to you, but he’s a hero back home in Kentucky. A regular injun killin’ Dan’l Boone. They gave him a hero’s reception (at $60 – $100 a head), where every Kentucky cracker cam out to sing his praises (except for Ferret Face MacConnell, of course, who is at once both intimidated and aroused by Bunning’s throbbing manliness).

“Jim Bunning has been right more than he’s been wrong,” said Kentucky Secretary of State Trey Grayson, a Republican who thinks of Bunning as his mentor. “And history will show that he, more than anyone else, predicted some of the economic problems we’re having now and worked to try to prevent them.”

Really? Jim Bunning more than anyone else saw all this coming? The guy’s a sage! Just stay the hell off his lawn.

The Catholics and pro-lifers are at it again, and this time it’s health care reform their after. You’d think that people who profess to be “pro life” would want everybody to have health care, but in this case, um, well, I’ll be damned. Seems Catholics in Alliance for the Common Good have come out in support of reform. And so has the Catholic Health Association.

I like the fact that it’ll stay light an hour later now, but why do they have to fuck with Sunday? Why not spring the clocks ahead an hour on, I dunno, maybe three o’clock on Friday afternoon? And when it comes time to fall back, how about we do it on a Monday morning at about five? I realize that might screw a few people over, but it would work out pretty well for me, and that’s really what it’s all about, isn’t it?

Hard to believe it’s been a year already, but it’s Pi Day once again. I think I’ll spend the day drawing circles and then dividing their circumferences by their diameters.

Mmmm. Federal aid for college students. Mmmm. Health care reform. HEY! You got your student aid all over my health care reform! You got your health care reform all over my student aid! Hey, wait a minute…. This is good! That’s right. Can’t pass HCR? Can’t expand federal aid for college students? Well, let’s put ’em together and see what happens. At the very least, it ought to make ferret face McConnell’s head explode. You know what? Let’s throw in legislation making it illegal to drown kittens, eat babies, and not call your mother on Mother’s Day, too. Make the fuckers vote against that. No “public option,” though. That might piss the insurance companies off.

As much as I think the HCR bill sucks, I really, really, really want it to pass. Why? Because they’ve been running these goddamn “tell your congresscritter to vote NO!” ads almost constantly on the local teevee. Seems the two Representatives from the districts around here (the two that didn’t just admit to being serial gropers) are apparently considered “swing votes”.

These ads have been running constantly during the morning news – sometimes two and three times in a row; ad buys must be pretty cheap around here – telling us “the people” told Pelosi and Obama to “slow down” but now they’re gonna use “special rules” to ram this down our throats (they of course fail to mention that this legislation already passed both houses – including 60 votes for it in the Senate – and that budget reconciliation is no more “special” than the dumb fucking rule that says Democrats need 60 votes to pass any laws and 40 votes are a majority, if they’re Republican votes).

I hate these goddamn commercials. So, they’ve managed to convince me that I’m a strong supporter of whatever the hell they come up with.

I do feel sorry for Bart Simpson Stupak, though. It appears his fifteen minutes of fame are pretty much over.

After playing a central role in the bid to ensure that federal funding for abortion is removed from the Democrats’ health care bill, Rep. Bart Stupak (D-Mich.) said in an interview on Friday that he is suddenly feeling left out.

“They’re ignoring me,” he told National Review Online….

Aw, poor Bart. Hopefully he’ll be able to retire to Connecticut soon, where he and that little weasel Joe Lieberman can sit around and tickle each other for hours on end, talking about how important they used to be.

Speaking of health-related issues, seems there’s an awful lot of herpes out there in the wild (which reminds me of that old joke about the guy who had sex with his canary and caught twerpes; worst part was, it was untweetable). More than 16% of Americans between 14 and 49 (I guess when you’re over 49 nobody gives a shit what you have) have HSV-2. And you ladies are twice as likely to have as the men folk are. 11.5% of men are apparently infecting 20.9% of the women out there. Especially black women, almost half of whom are infected. Thank goodness I’ll be told old to worry about it pretty soon (not that I’ve exactly had a lot of women – of any flavor – throwing themselves at me lately).

It’s not St. Patrick’s Day yet, but we’re having our annual parade today anyway. Personally, I think not actually having it on the actual St Patrick’s Day is an insult to the Irish. I mean, if they can shut down half of NYC and march up 5th Avenue on a Wednesday, I think they can do it here, too. But, what the hell. No harm in getting started early, I guess. Pionta Guinness, le do thoil.

Some days, when walking from the car into the grocery store, I worry about whether or not one of the idiots who seem to feel compelled to drive 40 mph through the parking lot will run me over. Other days, I all but dare them to hit me. “Go ahead, ya bastid. Hit me. But you better kill me, or I’ll pull your ass out of your car and tickle you ’til you can’t breathe.” Yesterday was one of the latter days, as I found myself in a bit of a foul mood – in spite of the rather exquisite weather we’ve been having. Alas, nobody took me up on my dare.

Is anybody else tired of the whole health care reform bullshit? Oh, we’re gonna pass it. Oh, there’s one last chance for a public option. Oh, if Obama supports it, it could pass. Oh, Paul Krugman says reform will reduce the deficit and isn’t a government takeover (no offense, Paul, but anybody with half a brain that’s been paying attention already knows that, and the Republicans and teabaggers really don’t care what liberal elitist smartypantses like you say). Whatever. Just shut up and do it, if you’re gonna do it. Or shut up and don’t do it. Either way, just shut up.

Speaking of HCR, Harry Reid has written Mitch McConnell a stern letter about reform and the reconciliation process. Nice letter. I think ol’ ferret face will be almost as moved as I was by it, immediately see the error of his ways, and offer to engage in a good old fashioned tickle fight with Democrats (all in good fun, of course). Hopefully somebody will tickle Joe Lieberman with a brick. Look, Harry, again. Just STFU and do it, if you’re gonna do it.

Oh well, time to get ready for you-know-what. Hopefully today will be a better day than yesterday, as we head in to a 47 hour weekend. This, of course, is the weekend where we all realize just how many goddamn clocks we have. My car alone has two in it (three, if I have the GPS in it – but that one changes itself). It typically takes me about 11 months to figure out how to change the clock on the car stereo (I just can’t bring myself to RTFM). At least I’ll have a lot of free time this weekend, now that I won’t be needing to watch any college basketball.

Have fun.