Still a lot of work to do around here, so there’s only time for a quick look at today’s talking schmucks.

Press the Meat has Governor Oily Barbour, DINO Mary Landrieu, Ed Markey, former Shell Oil President John Hofmeister, Katty Kay of the BBC, and the man who gets to decide how to spend BP’s $20 billion, Ken Feinberg.

On Faze the Nation, it’s the Senator whose hair isn’t up to Carly Fiorina’s standards, Barbara Boxer, Republican Congresscritter Joseph Cao, Bill Nelson of Florida, and the aptly named Dick Shelby.

Fux News Sunday will have Defense Secretary Robert Gates, ferret-face Mitch McConnell, “Power Player of the Week” Janine Turner (remember her?), and a whole bunch of fuxheads.

At the Goebbels network they’ll have slimeball Rahm Emanuel, plus a roundtable with mushmouth Greta Van Susteren, George :jerk: Will, Michel Martin, and Richard Haass of the Council on Foreign Relations.

Over at CNN, Fareed Zakaria tells us we need to stop being so mean to big oil, ‘cuz, let’s face it, we’re just a big oily bunch, and that’s not gonna change anytime soon. Then Fareed talks Afghanistan with Afghan opposition leader (and head of the Afghanistan’s Department of Redundancy Department) Abdullah Abdullah. Plus scumbag neo-con mastermind Paul Wolfowitz will tell us what’s wrong with Obama’s foreign policy (hint: he hasn’t invaded any new countries), and some rich Chinese woman tells us how to make a whole lotta yuan (from putting melamine in dog food and antifreeze in toothpaste, no doubt) ? And, finally, St. John McCain wants more regime change in the Middle East (let me guess, “bomb, bomb Iran?”).

To all the dads out there, Happy Father’s Day. If you’re dad is still around, do something nice for him today.

OK, back to work. Lots to do before True Blood.

It’s the weekend, but that doesn’t mean there’ll be any slacking off allowed. This week, it’s the living room. We started pulling up the shitty wall-to-wall carpeting that was covering very nice hardwood floors that look like they’re actually in really good shape (why the hell people cover stuff like that up is beyond me), but there’s a lot more to go. I’ve already framed out shelves and bookcases under, around, and over the picture window (which we installed, gee, I’m guessing it was about four or five years ago, but hadn’t gotten around to finishing), as well as little pony wall that connects to it to form an ‘L’ (with more shelves/bookcases), and I hope to at least get that part close to finished (well, built – not necessarily finished) by the time True Blood starts on Sunday.

Plus the grass needs to be cut, the dogs need to get to the park, Granny wants Windows 7 installed on her laptop, I really ought to install WordPress 3.0 – but that’s always a hassle – and I need to do my laundry and all that other weekend-type stuff. Hardly any time to drink beer (though I reckon I might manage to squeeze one or two in somewhere along the way). It’s gonna be 90 today, too, which doesn’t help, and there may be some thunderstorms, which will freak the dogs out (and they already hate it when we bang things around and make noise; they much prefer to hang out in the basement and watch TV).

We’ve got a deadline of Thanksgiving to get everything done. Well, “everything” will never be done, but in this case, it means finishing all the little odds and ends in the kitchen, doing the kitchen ceiling, totally gutting the half-bathroom (which is semi-gutted already), painting everything, and then putting down a new floor in the kitchen, bathroom, and hallway. Thanksgiving seems like a long way away, but we’re already almost at the summer solstice, and Turkey Day will be here before you know it.

So I guess I better get going. Or at least have another cup of coffee.

Tough day in Congress yesterday over the BP oil hole. Not for BP CEO Tony Hayward, whose day wasn’t great, but he sat there and took it like a man (well, not so much a man as pasty-faced little corporate shill, but whattya gonna do? I mean, the man already postponed his summer vacation – what else do you want out of him). But it turned out to be a really bad day for meathead Republican Joe “Shakedown” Barton, who was forced to apologize for apologizing to BP, lest he lose his position as Ranking Member on the House Energy and Commerce Committee.

Barton rescinded his apology (so, does that mean he wasn’t really sorry? Or is it that he’s just a callous, lying, loudmouthed blowhard), and is reportedly on a very tight leash. In addition to the leash, I’d advise a muzzle. No word on whether Michele Bachmann will be getting fitted for a muzzle as well (though I get the feeling she’d prefer a studded collar).

After several short weeks, I’ve actually made it through a five-day one (assuming I make it through today, which isn’t exactly a gimmee).

As everybody (except maybe Sue, who’s out on the prairie somewhere, attempting to acquire news via telegraph and a crystal radio set) heard yesterday, BP said it would set up an escrow account to be managed by a neutral party in order to satisfy ‘legitimate’ claims resulting from its little oil mishap in the Gulf of Mexico. They expect to eventually build the fund up to $20 billion over the next 3½ years, and they aren’t considering it a cap on their liability. They’re also going to set up a separate fund of $100 million to help out the oil workers affected by the 6-month pseudo moratorium on offshore oil drilling. Call me crazy, but I think this is a good thing. A really good thing, and I credit Obama with getting BP to commit to it (assuming there isn’t some scam in there somewhere that I can’t see). It doesn’t fix things, it doesn’t bring back all the dead sea critters (with many more to come), and it doesn’t do anything to get us off fossil fuels, but hopefully the “small people” will actually get some help out of all this. They sure as hell need a break.

And, yes, BP Chairman Carl-Henric Svanberg said

“I care about the small people. I hear comments sometimes that large oil companies are greedy companies or don’t care, but that is not the case at BP. We care about the small people.”

That, of course, has professionally offended people all kinds of pissed off. You know what? Go ahead and be pissed off at the cutting of corners to maximize profits at the expense of safety (not looking so cost-effective now, is it?), and be pissed off at the oil-coated sea turtles and dying pelicans, and the wetlands that won’t return in our lifetime, but to be pissed because some Swedish guy said “small people”? Give me a break.

Go give a press conference in Swedish, and let me know how you made out.

By the way, you know what turns the “small people” into “big people”? Unions, that’s what. That’s why we need them, that’s why they’re good for the country, and that’s why Blanche Lincoln and her anti-union cronies should go f*ck themselves. But I digress…

Not everybody likes the $20 billion escrow account, of course. The knee-jerk conservatives that were crying about Obama not doing anything are now crapping themselves in a fit of fake outrage over what they’re calling a “Chicago Style Shakedown”.

I suppose we should all be used to their hypocrisy by now, but it sure would be nice if somebody would stand up and tell them to just STFU. And you know what? I say it’s high time for a Chicago-style shakedown of the insurance industry, big pharma, Wall Street, and the military-industrial complex, too. Just for starters. These f*ckers have been shaking down us small people for an awfully long time, and I’d be more than happy to get some pay-back. So bring it on, you ignorant, corrupt, amoral konservative korporatist kocksuckers.

And of course Michelle Bachmann had to chime in, calling this a “redistribution of wealth.”

The Minnesota Independent reports that Bachmann spoke Tuesday to the Heritage Foundation, and badmouthed the idea. “The president just called for creating a fund that would be administered by outsiders, which would be more of a redistribution-of-wealth fund,” said Bachmann. “And now it appears like we’ll be looking at one more gateway for more government control, more money to government.”

Also, David Weigel reports that Bachmann also said: “They have to lift the liability cap. But if I was the head of BP, I would let the signal get out there — ‘We’re not going to be chumps, and we’re not going to be fleeced.’ And they shouldn’t be. They shouldn’t have to be fleeced and make chumps to have to pay for perpetual unemployment and all the rest — they’ve got to be legitimate claims.”

Because, of course, “those people” down there just want to collect welfare and unemployment, and honorable corporations can’t trust them – or that you-know-what in the White House – to do the right thing.

Michelle, honey, if it wasn’t for the chumps of Minnesota’s 6th Congressional District, you wouldn’t be in office, now would you?

Oh well, time for this chump to head out amongst the small people and seize the day.

I didn’t watch Obama’s speech last night, and from what I’m reading this morning, I’m glad I didn’t waste my time. It appears he said basically nothing, proposed nothing specific, and didn’t give Congress anything at all to work with. From “kinda better than nothing” health care reform to “barely better than nothing” financial reform to a “basically nothing” reform of US energy policy to “staying the course” (if not doubling down) on Afghanistan and whatever the hell it is we’re doing in Iraq these days, Obama has squandered every opportunity to really do something for the people of this country, and to be a real commander-in-chief. When faced with crises, memorable Presidents rise to the occasion. Much like his predecessor, this one hasn’t. I don’t know if he’s trying to play it safe, or if he just doesn’t care. I’d like to see him throw Rahm Emmanuel out on his ass and start over again. Where’s Leo McGarry when you need him?

On the bright side, fisher people in North Carolina caught and killed a record-size (883 pound) Blue Marlin. They look so proud.

June is past the halfway point, yet they’re still playing basketball. Just doesn’t seem right. It’ll all (finally) be over Thursday night as the Lakers and Celtics will battle to see if we can have the most boring 7-game Championship in NBA history. Last night, the Lakers only managed to score 89 points, which turned out to be plenty, since Boston only managed an anemic 67. :yawn: OK, I admit, that’s not fair, since I haven’t watched any of it. I haven’t liked the Lakers since they moved from Minneapolis (which, as that happened before I was born, means forever), and of course I hate the Celtics for the fierce rivalry with the Syracuse Nationals (also mostly before I was born, and certainly before I have any memory of them playing here). I’ve seen interviews with Red Auerbach talking about how much he hated Syracuse and their fans, which I take great pride in.

Our Governor has proposed an early retirement incentive program. If it passes, there’s a possibility that I could retire early. Sadly, the place I work at would have to allow it, since they wouldn’t be able to fill my position if I retire (and they seem to think I’m needed), and, even if they did let me go, I’d take a 42% penalty for not being old enough, on top of only having about 12 years of service, which would only net me about $750 a month. That’s just not gonna cut it – even with a part time job at Home Depot.

So, as usual, it’s off to work I go. Can’t believe it’s only Wednesday. This week is taking forever.

I had a feeling yesterday would suck, and I was correct. Got a notice from my bank that there was ‘suspicious’ credit card activity, and they were correct, too. So, card canceled. Now I have to figure out all my auto-pay stuff and make sure it’s all set up properly. The park is still closed, so I was unable to get the dogs out for a walk. They haven’t been able to run around out there since last Tuesday, and they’re very bored and depressed (and wondering why I’m being so mean to them). This really sucks. Then, my van was finally done, so I picked that up (and it cost way too much money, but at least I can fill the gas tank up – though that costs was too much money, too). Of course, sans credit card, I had to find my damn checkbook, and figure out how to make out a check (which I almost never do anymore). Work sucked as well (I mean, more than on a typical Monday).

On the brighter side of things, our NYS Legislature managed to pass another weekly emergency spending bill, so NY doesn’t have to shut down yet. Maybe next week.

The President will be on the teevee tonight, telling us how we’re gonna fix the Gulf of Mexico and get off fossil fuels. Unless he’s announcing an Apollo-style program to get us off oil by the end of this decade, I don’t expect to be impressed.

Well, I hope things start to get better today.

We all know that Arizona Republicans hate Mexicans. Sadly, they also hates kids. Well, Mexican kids, anyway. And now they’re trying to pass a bill that would deny birth certificates to children born of undocumented immigrants (aka, those godless Mexicans). AZ Governor Jan “Prune Puss” Brewer says they can just “take their kids back” to Mexico. This is all just crazy talk, since the US Constitution’s 14th Amendment is pretty clear in saying…

All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States

And of course all Republicans are “strict Constitutionalists”, so they’d never go for it.

On Press the Meat today, it’s David Axelrod, plus a roundtable with Carly Fiorina (who’s really got a lot of nerve making fun of anybody else’s hair), Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Roger Simon, and Chuck Todd.

It’s a Governor’s of the Gulf kinda day on Faze the Nation with Florida Governor Charlie Crist, Mississippi Governor Haley “oil? what oil?” Barbour, and Alabama Governor Bob Riley, plus U.S. Coast Guard Admiral Thad Allen.

Carly makes her way over to chat with Weaselface Wallace on Fux News Sunday. Also on, Ambassador Susan Rice and “Power Player” Barbara Bush (not the old one, but the young one). And lots-o-fuxheads, of course.

At the Goebbels network, it’s Steny Hoyer, Papa John Boehner, and Bill Gates. Plus a roundtable with George :jerk: Will, Donna Brazile, Robert Reich and Tom Davis (it would be nice if it was Al Franken’s old partner, but I fear it’ll be that schmuck Republican from North Dakota instead.

Over at CNN, Fareed Zakaria gets mad at the media’s demand that Obama “show some emotion” instead of actually doing something. Plus an interview with Paul Wolfowitz (hide your comb, Fareed), plus the Israeli Deputy Foreign Minister, the tragic story of Neda, who, you may recall, was the woman killed a year ago by the Iranian government during the post-election demonstrationsa and a look at how the financial district of Shanghai has transformed into a breathtaking new skyline.

Of course, none of that really matters, because later on tonight it’s the Season 3 premiere of True Blood on HBO. That Sookie is just so gosh darn cute.

Have a good one.

I watched “Apollo 13” last night. Not all of it – I stumbled into it at about the halfway mark. I’ve seen it a few hundred times before, but always have a hard time passing it up when it’s on. For one thing, Bill Paxton’s in it, and it’s always fun to try and decide which is more dire: being stranded in a freezing, crippled, and dying space capsule a quarter million miles from earth, or living in Utah with three wives. Tough call, but if forced to choose, I think I’d opt for the space capsule (unless you let me pick chasing tornadoes with Helen Hunt). Seems a bit safer – especially if you’ve got a pissed-off Sissy Spacek after you.

Of course, I also enjoy watching that movie ‘cuz it’s set “back in my day”. I was about 10 years old at the time, and – like most boys my age back then, I guess – I was big into all that space shit (still am, truth be told; we’d be a lot better off spending more money on space and less on trying to kill everybody who lives on top of our oil). It’s fun to watch all those people in the old 60s-ish clothes and haircuts (and cars), all smoking cigarettes constantly (stomping out the butts in those plaid sandbag ashtrays – remember them?), sitting in front of those Mission Control “monitors”.

I guess the thing I like best about those days is that it seemed like the good old US of A could do just about anything. And if we couldn’t do it yet, by golly, it wouldn’t be long before we’d figure out how (well, except for that whole Vietnam thing, but even that wasn’t all bad – a lot of good music came out of it, not to mention free love and pot). You know, “American ingenuity” (for you younger folks, that’s a phrase they used to say about us back in the olden days) and all that.

We were actually known for being smart and and having a “can do” attitude back then (and by “we”, I of course refer to the generation one or two before mine).

If there’d been an oil well blowout in the Gulf of Mexico in 1969, we’d have locked a couple dozen white shirt and tie-wearing, crew cut-sporting egghead engineers in a room, tossed in a couple cartons of Luckies, and in a few hours they’d have come up with a way to make a plug out of cardboard, plastic bags, vacuum cleaner hoses, and duct tape. Then John Wayne woulda dove down through the burning oil with a knife between his teeth, plugged the hole, and then come up and give Maureen O’Hara a nice big wet one smack on the lips. All on one breath

Now, well, we don’t seem capable of doing much of anything any more.

I blame Reagan.

Big news (apparently; the biggest news of the day – at least if the Today Show is any indication), as Abby Sunderland has been spotted. She’s a teenager attempting to sail solo around the world, I guess. I vaguely remember hearing about this before, but, well, I wasn’t really paying attention. I’m mostly just trying to get through the day these days, and today, another work week comes to an end, which is always a good thing.

Those of us who work for the State of NY are kind of wondering how many work weeks we have left, though. A new emergency spending bill is due by Monday night, and if our hardworking legislators fail to pass it (as they’re making more and more noise about doing it), or fail to pass a budget (which they appear incapable of doing), then NY runs out of money.

Nobody’s really sure what happens at that point. Half a million NYers on unemployment won’t get their checks. They won’t have money to pay State employees past June 23rd (whether they’ll tell us all to stay home or try and pay us with ‘script’ – which they’ve done in the past – I don’t know). Will they shut down State prisons? Tell the State Troopers to stay home? Maybe mobilize the NY State National Guard to patrol the highways and run the prisons? What happens to hospitals? Things could get very interesting around here.

For now, though, it’s just another week of life over. 2,588 down, 1,325 to go (give or take).