I’m gonna try not to talk about the weather this morning (OK, Iied; it’s cold. But that’s all I’ll say). So, what else does that leave? Something alliterative would be nice. Ah, how’s this? Many Marauding Monkeys Make Mayhem, Maul Man.

Dozens of monkeys went berserk on an Indonesian plantation, injuring one man as they made off with crops and chicken eggs.

The Antara news agency reports a rubber tapper had to receive 60 inches to an arm injured after about 10 of the monkeys set upon him.

A total of 40 to 60 unspecified wild monkeys were involved in the attack, which occurred about 100 miles west of Singapore, in the village of Teluk Mesjid, located in Sumatra’s Siak River basin.

The rubber tapper, Juju, told the agency that this is not the first time monkeys have raided the village or injured its residents.

Wow, he received 60 inches to his arm? Damn, Juju’s gonna be dragging that damn thing around something fierce. He can probably tap those rubber trees way up high now, though.

So, I’m wondering if it isn’t time for all of us to change our voter registration and become Republicans (those of us who live in states that require a party affiliation to vote in the primaries, anyway). Because, let’s face it, short of a Bobby Kennedy coming out and running, Obama will be the Democratic candidate, and, setting aside the question of whether he sucks or not, he’s looking like a certain loser. So maybe it’s time to try and affect the Republican primary and see if we can’t get the least objectionable Republican nominated. Now, who, exactly, that would be, I dunno. I hate to say it, but of the names I’m familiar with, I think I’d have to go with good old Huckleberry Huckabee. Not that he’s exactly a perfect candidate, but, well, we’re a bit limited in our choices here.

And he doesn’t have a prayer (so to speak) anyway, so I guess it doesn’t matter. If I had to guess, I’d guess they’d go with Mannequin Mitt (though he’s got some hurdles to overcome with “the base”). Sir Newt is making noises about running (as usual), but he’s a proven loser. Sister Sarah? Nah. Running is too much work. Who else is there? I don’t know, I don’t like to think about Republicans for too long. It kinda makes me throw up in my mouth.

Speaking of Republicans, let’s hear it for the newly elected Governors of Ohio and Wisconsin, who are too principled (or whatever) to accept hundreds of millions of dollars for high speed rail. The big winners? California and Florida.

California’s high-speed rail plan will receive up to $624 million in additional federal funds, Transportation Department officials announced Thursday.

The new funding adds to the $715 million in federal funds previously awarded to California. It arrives courtesy of Ohio and Wisconsin, two states where recently elected Republican governors decided not to accept their own allotment of high-speed rail dollars.

“I am pleased that so many other states are enthusiastic about the additional support they are receiving to help bring America’s high-speed rail network to life,” Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood declared in a written statement.

LaHood’s redistribution of an additional $1.195 billion in high-speed rail funding provoked cheers among lawmakers who had been lobbying for a bigger slice, but regret among some Midwesterners who saw their own money slip away.

California is one of 12 states that will receive a piece of the redirected funds. Florida, the next biggest beneficiary will get $300 million.

Hey, all due respect to CA and FL, but what about us? We want your money – and not just so folks can go from NYC to DC or Philly or Boston fast, either. How ’bout some high speed rain up here in the provinces, too? Just make sure ours have snow plows on the front.

Good morning. How y’all doing? Sorry if this is turning into the local weather report every day, but all I’ve really had time to pay attention to the past few days is moving snow, white-knuckle driving, and sleep (hell, I didn’t even mention that SU kicked Michigan State’s ass down in The Garden the other night). Around here, everybody looks pretty tired (more from the stress of trying to get back and forth to work than anything else, I think. Not that I’m complaining, mind you. We don’t get hurricanes or earthquakes or tornadoes, and sooner or later the snow melts, spring comes, and it gets too goddamn hot, and the snow is really quite beautiful if you don’t have to go to work). Anyhow, I know I’m pretty tired, so I’m taking today (and tomorrow) off. What with there supposed to be a break in the snow (only a couple of inches predicted for today), I decided I needed to take some time to catch my breath a little bit.

Driving in to work was a royal pain in the ass yesterday (for a change). It started out as it has all week, with me out on the tractor plowing the driveway. Unfortunately, the tractor started to sound kinda crappy, and eventually it was all I could do to get it to limp back into the garage. On the bright side, I’d gotten enough cleared to get out of the driveway, and we decided that we’d both go in to work together – with me driving my in-law’s Jeep Cherokee (very nice vehicle, that thing; 4WD, rear wiper, 9 years old with 21,500 miles on it). It would have been truly unbearable w/o it.

So, I got granny to work, made it to the dentist with 2 minutes to spare, and then to work. I went out and got some Cetane boost for the tractor (I’m hoping it was just crappy diesel) at lunch time, and then things were actually not too crappy for the ride home (I actually saw some bare pavement on the road, and the crescent moon and stars in the sky), and, thanks to the Jeep, I was able to get in to the driveway and blast through the very impressive snow drifts that seem to build up out here when you don’t plow for a few hours.

I put the booster in the tank and ran the tractor for 15 minutes or so, but, as we’re both off today, I didn’t bother taking it out and doing any work with it. Figured there was no point in getting myself aggravated. I also checked the air filter, just to make sure it hadn’t gotten full of snow and turned into a giant ice ball or something (which it didn’t). Everything seemed to run fine (a bit of white smoke for a while; maybe water in the diesel? See if I ever buy it from that place again), so we’ll see. I’ll run it for a while again today before I get out on it. It really needs to work, ‘cuz we were supposed to get another 8-16 inches overnight (too dark to see what the damage was right now), and another storm is coming (plus it’s gonna get really cold next week; something to look forward to).

So, officially, since Saturday, Syracuse had gotten over 43″ as of midnight last night. That’s not the most snow we’ve ever gotten around here, but it’s plenty. We typically average about 17″ to this point in the season, and we’ve got over 2½ times that.

I’m really hoping this is one of those years where it starts out like this and then peters out.

Oh well, in keeping with the weather theme, I saw this on the Intertubes. It’s an example of what a ‘high-tech’ weather report was like 36 years ago. Note the magnetic numbers and what looks like a paper version of the satellite photo (you can see the wrinkly paper), on which they apparently had to outline Europe with a magic marker. And they didn’t have a US Satellite image, ‘cuz the NOAA satellite didn’t pass over the US that day. Oh, we’ve come a long way. Not necessarily to a better place, but it’s been a long journey.

The weather dude in this clip, by the way, is Steve Newman, who you may know from Earthweek (which premiered as a column in the SF Chronicle in 1988 and is widely syndicated today), as well as from the Discovery Channel and GMA. All the good ones make their way through Syracuse. Sports and weather – that’s our thing.

Sad day yesterday with the news of the death of Elizabeth Edwards. I hope her passing was peaceful, and I’m glad she could afford the best of health care (and serious drugs, when the time came). Whenever I see somebody “famous” going through something like this, I of course feel sad for them, but, even more sadly, lots of other people suffer through the same types of illness every day (many of them totally alone), and when they finally pass on, they often leave families devastated and bankrupt. Maybe, had her ex-husband gotten elected (and not turned out to be a schmuck), Elizabeth would have brought a human face to the death panel debate. But the president we did wind up with knows how to compromise (he’s so good at it, he knows how to pre-compromise), so we have socialized medicine tax cuts for rich people are protected.

Speaking of sad, it was 30 years ago today that John Lennon was murdered by an idiot who had the right to bear arms. It would have been nice to hear all the music that went un-made over the past 30 years (especially if every other track wasn’t from Yoko; I guess I am classless and clueless, but I just can’t appreciate her, um, whatever it is she does). I’d like to have heard his opinion on George Dubya.

Have I mentioned that it’s been snowing here? In fact, it hasn’t stopped snowing for something like 90 hours now. Syracuse has gotten three feet of snow since Saturday, and I don’t know what we’ve gotten out where I live, but I’ll bet it’s close to double that. And it’s not going to stop today, either. Maybe a little break tomorrow, Friday, and Saturday, they say (not that it won’t snow; just not as much). Then Sunday a N’oreaster is coming, which should suck (the weather geek says it will be a “more significant event” than what we’re having now), and as that passes through, there will be more lake effect snow as the wind swirls across Lake Ontario.

I must admit I’m getting just a wee bit tired of this. I don’t mind having a big storm come through every now and again, but when it snows 8 or 10 (or 12 or more) inches a day every day, it kinda sucks. I’m glad I have a tractor, but it still gets a little cold out there (it’s in the teens at the moment, and hasn’t been warmer than about 25 with the wind as relentless as the snow). Last night I made some trails around the back yard for the dogs to have some room to run around (and take a crap). Too dark to see, but they’re probably all filled in by now.

When I went to start my van yesterday, it wouldn’t. So, I had to take my car, which, of course, had no snow tires (and the regular tires are pretty sucky, too, with 3 out of 4 being the crummy stock ones). I decided to take the afternoon off, got a portable jump starter (been meaning to get one for a while) and a battery for the van, and then decided to go ahead and wait for snow tires on the car (as you might suspect, they’re selling a lot of snow tires this week).

As I was waiting, it occurred to me that the ‘Service Engine Soon’ light was on as I struggled to get home on Monday night (which I dutifully ignored, figuring it was something stupid I could deal with in the spring). So who knows? Maybe I don’t need a battery after all. We’ll see. Too damn cold and too much snow to mess with it at the moment.

On the bright side, snow tires turned out to make a huge difference. Who knew? I don’t think I’ve had snow tires since I had my Chevette, and they were studded. But that was about 30 years ago.

Oh well, another cup of coffee and then, you guessed it, time to plow the driveway before a trip in to the dentist.

I just got up, and already I need a nap.

So, it was 69 years ago today that the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor. Some pretty tough days were ahead for the good old USA. It makes me wish we had somebody like FDR as President right about now. It’s also my father-in-law’s birthday (he’s 89 today). Yesterday, I wasn’t sure he’d be here for it. Apparently he went out at 6AM to shovel the snow (yeah, I think maybe they ought to get somebody to plow the driveway for ’em), then came back in and fell asleep in the chair, and my mother-in-law couldn’t wake him up. To make a long story short, I guess he went to the ER and had all the usual tests, and he seemed to be OK, though they kept him overnight for observation (much to his protestation, from what I hear). He should get out today, so that’s a good thing.

We got the news yesterday that SU’s punter (who was voted team captain, and is one of the best punters in the country – lots of practice, that’s for sure – won’t be playing in the Pinstripe Bowl. Turns out, he’s been having headaches, and has a brain tumor that has to be removed immediately. So, no more practice, no bowl game, and, since he’s a senior, his Syracuse career is over. They say it’s a benign tumor, though, so hopefully he’ll be OK.

Also a tough day for Elizabeth Edwards. It sounds like the clock is running out on her battle with breast cancer. It’s a shame. The older I get, the more tuned in I seem to be on all the ways your shit can get fucked up and kill you. One day you’re OK (as far as you know), and the next, bam. Brain hemorrhage, cancer, brain tumor…. When Granny was a hospice nurse, she’d come home and share tales of all sorts of ways that people die (some pretty horrible; exsanguination while all alone and trying to call 911 sounds particularly nasty – especially if you’re the person who has to clean it up). I’d just as soon go a pit more peacefully when it’s time (and find out I’ve been wrong all this time about the whole life after death thing – as long as there’s no hell or purgatory; not that I’m particularly evil, but I’m not exactly perfect, either, and if my Catholic upbringing turns out to not have been bullshit, I could go straight to hell forever on nothing but a technicality like not going to church or not confessing that I was mean to my mother or something).

In other news, it snowed all day yesterday, and it appears to have snowed all night last night, and it’s supposed to snow all day today. Tomorrow – snow, turning to snow tomorrow night. It’s cold, it’s windy, and it’s snowy. Up until Saturday, we hadn’t had as much as an inch of snow in a day since last February – 280 days in all, and the second longest such stretch (last year was a record 287 days).

Well, so much for that.

It was snowing so hard when I inched my way home last night (too dark to see with the regular headlight, and with the brights, it looked like I was on the bridge of the Enterprise traveling at about warp 8 with the stars whizzing by. At one point, it was so dark and the snow was going sideways so hard that I started to feel as if I was moving sideways – which is a pretty freaky feeling when you’re trying to make your way w/o driving in to a ditch (which you don’t wanna do, ‘cuz let me tell ya, the ditches out here are really frickin’ deep, and if you go in, you aint gettin’ back out again on your own).

Officially, as of about 4 o’clock yesterday afternoon, the officially tally for Syracuse was about 14 1/2″. I have no idea how much we’ve gotten where I live. Let’s just say it’s a lot, and has to be measured in feet, rather than inches. Drifts are higher than the 4-foot fence I put up for the dogs, and I’m already running out of places to put the snow I’m plowing. And that’s all based on how things looked at 7:00 last night. I haven’t gotten out there yet this morning.

I sure picked a good year to move out to the snow belt.

Oh well, one more cuppa joe, and then it’s tractor time.

Golly, if this past weekend is any indication, we’re in for an Olde Tyme winter this year. I don’t know what the official snow totals are so far, but out where I live, we had nine inches as of about 2:00 yesterday afternoon – and there was no end in sight. It’s too dark to see how much we’ve gotten since then, but it looks like quite a bit. Another 8-10 inches at least, I bet. Maybe more. And the forecast for this week is snow, snow, snow, a little less snow, snow, and snow (and maybe a Nor’easter for next Sunday/Monday). Cold, too. Not so bad temperature-wise (it’s about 20 degrees out there at the moment), but the wind has been constant at 20-25 mph, so it was feeling a little nippy out there on the tractor (especially when facing directly into the wind with the snow being driven into my face). Beats using a shovel, though. So, time for one more cup of coffee, and then time to plow the driveway (again). I guess my ‘My Shape’ morning workout will just have to wait today (which is OK, ‘cuz two days of it has me kinda sore anyway – god, what pathetic shape I’ve allowed myself to get into; oh well, gotta start someplace).

Tonight is the season finale of Boardwalk Empire, which is too darn bad. With ‘Big Love’ not starting until January, I’m not sure what there is worth watching (never did get into ‘In Treatment.’ I watched it a couple of times and realized I really didn’t give a crap about the characters in it – I’m not allowed to complain, so why should I have to listen to somebody else. Usually I try to give these shows a fair chance, but, I just couldn’t get into it) on HBO for a while. Though ‘Men of a Certain Age’ starts tomorrow, and I like that. Oh well, from the looks of things, I may be spending a lot of time plowing the driveway anyway. Speaking of which….

Yep, it’s Saturday, and I started out the morning with a rousing workout. Well, actually I started out the day with coffee, last night’s Sanctuary and Medium, and then a rousing workout, courtesy of my latest Kinect ‘game’ – “Your Shape.” It’s hard not to feel like an idiot when you’re doing what, heretofore, I’d have considered girlie exercises done to girlie music (I wonder if you can change that somewhere?), while being nagged by some broad telling you you’re not doing it right. It’s even harder with your wife sitting there watching and laughing at you. But, I made some decent progress for my first time, and am still sweating as I write this. Hopefully I’ll be motivated to continue with this (without an audience) on at least a three days a week basis. Plus get in a game or two of ping pong (which has certainly come a long way since my first game of pong – which my favorite but much older sister was kind enough to buy for me, oh, probably in the neighborhood of 35 or more years ago). Oh well, time to measure to go buy some pipe and fittings, get some diesel fuel, and then get ready to do some driveway plowing. Seems to be snowing out there.

Today is my favorite sister’s birthday. I think she turns 29 today (more or less). It’s also Amanda Seyfried’s birthday. Amanda, if you don’t have any plans tonight, I’d be happy to go out and celebrate with you. It’s Friday, so I can maybe even stay up ’til 10:00. Maybe. If you make it worth my while. 😉

It’s also Ozzie Osbourne’s birthday today, and Daryl Hannah hits the big 5-0 (yes Daryl and I were born a month apart, and I’ve always – and by always, I mean ever since the movie ‘Summer Lovers’ – thought we were destined to be together – but, then again, I always – and by always, I mean ever since her guest roles on ‘The Courtship of Eddie’s Father’ – thought Jodie Foster and I were destined to be together, too, and that’s not really working out – though with Jodie I have an excuse, what with her playing for the other team and all). Anyhow, Daryl, if you wanna hang out with Amanda and me tonight, that’s cool (maybe even crank up some Jackson Browne tunes).

In other news, the Hess gas station I worked at about, oh, must be 25 years ago or more, was robbed last night. I hope the poor schmuck working there was keeping up on his drops. If you’ve never had the pleasure of working at such an establishment, there’s a safe cemented into the floor with a little slot in it, and anytime you had more than a couple hundred bucks in the till, you were supposed to put it in an envelope and drop it down the chute. Being a schmuck and all, you didn’t have the combination to the safe, so the hope was that the robber would believe you when you told him that was all the money you had, and not blow your head off out of spite. Either way, the asshole that owned the place wouldn’t lose much money (except whatever it cost to clean your brain bits off the wall).

I don’t know if the same asshole owns the place or not. If so, I know that no matter how little money he lost last nickel – even if it was only a nickel – will pain him greatly. And that would be a good thing. Did I mention he was an asshole?

Otherwise, it’s official: SU football is going to play in a bowl game for the first time since the 2004 season. And there’s good news for Sue, ‘cuz they’ll be playing in the new Yankee stadium, so she’ll be able to attend. Yes, a football game outdoors in New York on December 30th. :cold: Should be fun. You can tell it’s a prestigious bowl game, because it’s being played on a Thursday afternoon at 3:30 (so I should hopefully get to see most of the 4th quarter after work). Still, beggars can’t be choosers, and we’re not complaining.

Well, Friday is upon us, and not a moment too soon. I’m looking forward to getting this horrible 5-day week behind me. And we’re supposed to get some more snow this weekend, which means I should get some quality seat time on the tractor. I see that my insulated Elmer Fudd hat with the faux-fur ear flaps has made it over from the old house (though there appears to be no sign of my insulated coveralls), so that’s a good thing. I had a hard time seeing behind me with my hood up the other night, so I got kinda cold. The hat should be a big improvement. And besides, it make me look pretty hot.

Play your cards right, Daryl and Amanda, and I might wear it for you tonight. :hubba:

We got some snow yesterday. Not as much as they got south of Buffalo, where lake effect off Lake Erie dumped a foot of snow (and counting). To quote Arlo Guthrie, “the NY State Thruway is closed, man.” But enough where I got to get out there on the tractor and plow the driveway. I’ve never had so much fun moving snow (everything’s better on a tractor, I’ve come to find out). Then I came in and played several rousing ping pong matches on the XBOX (my shoulder was pretty sore by the time I was done), and then tried my hand (and legs) at track and field. Despite having trouble because I couldn’t stop laughing (having to run in place and then jump up in the air to do the long jump and run the hurdles is inexplicably hilarious – as is running in place and throwing the javelin), I managed to win the competition against all the other computer opponents (of course, I selected beginner level opponents). The only event I bombed in was the discus, which I didn’t actually get the hang of. The big question is, do I order the ‘My Shape’ game? Oh, I think I do. In fact, I think I just did.

In other news that I’m not really paying attention to, it looks like the Republicans – after being elected to power for a scant four weeks or so, and not actually taking office yet – have managed to rescue the economy (if not the world) from the evil clutches of the incompetent Democrats.

The economy is showing new life in the final months of the year. Factories are busier, construction spending is up, and auto sales are rising. And on Wednesday the stock market had its best day since September after a report that the private sector hired the most workers in three years.

“The economy is starting to show better overall momentum,” said Brian Bethune, an economist at IHS Global Insight. “There’s a steady improvement in the overall tone.”

A private trade group said U.S. factory output grew for the 16th straight month in November as auto sales rebounded and businesses invested more in industrial machinery.

Imagine that. Two years of Obama put the economy in the crapper after years of, well, I forget who it was that was running the show before Obama, but surely they had nothing to do with the sorry state of affairs we’ve seen lately (and don’t call me Shirley), and it only takes a month of Republicans doing little more than sniffing at the seats of power in Congress to turn things around.

Of course, Republicans have God on their side.

Why, oh why, did we ever let these Jehova-fearing geniuses fall from power in the first place?

Yesterday, I succumbed to temptation and purchased a ‘Kinect’ for my XBOX, along with the Sports game. Far be it for me to gush over anything, but goddamn it’s pretty cool. So far, I’ve tried Table Tennis, Boxing, Bowling, and Beach Volleyball. My shoulder is killing me today (messed it up bowling, trying to put some spin on the ball), and I was pretty tired by the time I quit (especially the boxing; that was a lot of work). About the only thing I don’t like is that after you play a game, it shows you a straight up video of what a f*cking idiot you looked like while playing. It would be pretty funny if it was somebody else, though. The dogs thought I was nuts, and promptly proceeded to the kitchen where they could watch and wonder what the hell I was doing from a safe distance.

To balance my frivolous purchase, I also put in an order for 4 tons of wood pellets. They won’t be delivered until 12/20, which gives me time to clear a space in the garage (and save up for them; at $234 a ton including delivery, they’ll cost me close to a thousand bucks, but that’s the price one pays for keeping warm). Not sure how much I’ll go through. In the past, I never used more than a 40 pound bag a day in the coldest weather, though my current configuration is quite a bit different (and I have a bigger stove). A bag a day between now and the end of April would be about 3 tons (and I have probably 3/4 of a ton on hand), so 4 tons should be ample. But, we’ll see.

Have you been on unemployment for a while? Might wanna get out there and get a paper route or something, ‘cuz the Republicans have blocked an extension of unemployment benefits. If you’re unemployed and you voted for a Republican/teabagger, well, guess what? You got what you deserve. It’s just a shame you stuck the rest of us with these idiots.

It’s actually about 60 degrees out this morning, but very windy and with heavy rains coming a little bit later on. Of course, what with the weekend coming and all, temperatures are supposed to drop later on this week. I guess it’ll be a good opportunity to work on my ping pong skills.