NASA has discovered the first of what will no doubt be many planets outside our solar system – they’re calling it “Kepler-22b” – that’s in the “Goldilocks Zone” (that is, not too hot and not too cold to support liquid water – a requirement to support life as we know it). It’s about two-and-a-half times larger than Earth, in a 290-day orbit (pretty close to our year) around its sun, and estimated to have a temperature of about 70 degrees (which sounds pretty good this time of year). Sadly, it’s 600 light years away, so odds are we won’t be able to winter there (until they work out this whole warp speed thing). Although there’s no guarantee that there’s liquid water on the Kepler-22b (let alone life), NASA believes it’s much more likely to contain intelligent life than the Tea Party.

Speaking of the teabaggers, they sure do love them some Newt (Democrats, too. Libertarians, not so much). Having dispatched Herman Cain for, apparently, being a serial philanderer, Republicans are embracing the Newt (because it’s OK when a white guy does it). Not only is Newt sticking it to Mittens in Iowa with his lead swollen to 33-18, but Newt is likewise engorged in South Carolina – up 38-22. Iowa and South Carolina. No reason they shouldn’t dictate who gets to President – as long as it’s OK with New Hampshire, of course.

Meanwhile, assuming you’re not a millionaire, get ready for your taxes to go up in January. Republicans apparently have no qualms about letting the payroll tax cuts for regular people expire.

You know what? While I’d just as soon not pay higher taxes, I’m willing to let my tax cut expire as long as they let the millionaire’s tax cuts expire, too. See, the average payroll tax cut saves the little people about $1,000 a year. $20 a week. Now, twenty bucks is twenty bucks, don’t get me wrong. But the average millionaire is paying $136,000 less this year thanks to the Bush tax cuts.

In other words, I’m going to work for (quite a bit) less than they’re saving in tax cuts.

For those teabaggers out there who are mathematically challenged, here’s a simple tip: 136,000 does not equal 1,000.

In fact, 136,000 is way, way, WAY more than 1,000 (about 136x more).

So, I offer two possible “compromises” for you all. The first one is that you millionaires go back to paying what you were paying before, and so do I. The second one is that I keep saving $1,000, and you rich folks can go ahead and keep a grand of that $136,000.

$1,000 = $1,000.

Cool? Cool.