By now, I’m sure you’ve seen the video of intrepid reporter and former U-Boat commander Wolf Blitzer asking Moore, OK resident Rebecca Vitsmun if she was thanking “the lord” for having escaped death in this week’s mega-tornado. Vitsmun, of course, politely (and genially) responded that she’s an atheist, so, like, no. I’d have liked to have seen Wolf ask other survivors if they were blaming “the lord” for having wiped their town off the map. Or asking parents if they were angry at “the lord” for having sent a tornado to a school and killing their kids. It’s always “the lord” or “the angels” were on my side when you escape disaster, but they never claim responsibility for putting you in these shitty positions in the first place, other than maybe the vague “it’s God’s will” or “‘the lord’ works in mysterious ways.” If Wolf had asked me if I was thanking “the lord,” I’d have told him: “Fuck no, Wolf. If there is a God, I wanna know why the hell He just destroyed my (literally) goddamned house!”