Doing a little channel flipping last night, I caught a few minutes of ‘Office Space.’ It never fails to get a chuckle out of me – especially the printer that looks suspiciously like the HP LaserJet 4 that I got for $25 (including spare toner cartridge and extra 500 sheet capacity tray) from the SU Law School junk sale back in about 2001. Like the one in the movie, it seems to think there’s a paper jam when there isn’t one (at least when the HC tray is pushed in). I should really get a new one, but I rarely print anything (at home, anyway) and can’t see spending the money on it.

Anyhow watching Office Space (“Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about mission statements!”) was rather appropriate, because today is the day of our office Christmas Party Holiday Gathering (not to be confused with the Holiday Happening, where the important people show they’re just like the rest of us little people by serving ice cream. That was yesterday. Being lactose intolerant, I did not attend).

Yes, they scheduled a holiday party on Friday the 13th. Seeing as I’m working from home today, the odds of me driving a half hour to go to a bar and not drink (not only would I then have to drive home, there’s always the chance that after a few beers a little “truth” might slip out) while feeling obliged to eat pizza and wings (not that I don’t like pizza and wings – let’s just say that when I do eat that kind of stuff, I really don’t want a bar bathroom to be my only option) were quite slim to begin with. Add to that the fact that I already see the people that I’d care to hang out with every day I’m at the office and therefore have no real need to see them “out in the wild,” and, well, I guess I just don’t see the point.

We were supposed to RSVP for this by Tuesday, but on Monday the upper mucky-muck’s assistant called around for a head count, and I sadly had to tell her that I would be unable to attend. Much to my surprise, a spreadsheet was soon distributed to the manager-level folks, detailing who would be coming and who would not (with the reason why not). Apparently, only my office mate (who had some lame excuse about having to pick up her kid from college) and I are not going. Had I known we needed to provide an excuse, I’d have had my wife write a note explaining that I had to wait for a previously scheduled appliance delivery.

So, I guess I’m on the shit list. Personally, I consider this harassment.

Just got an e-mail from “BJs” the shopping “club” I belong to (hey, it’s a union perk and they have pretty good gas prices, plus if you need a pallet of toilet paper it’s the place to go), and they’ve got a good deal on a Keurig coffee maker. I’ve been lusting after one of these for a while now, having first encountered one a few years back when I went to a training thing in DC and they had a commercial Keurig at the training center. It was plumbed to water, so all you had to do was put your pod in and put your cup down, and whoosh – a cuppa Joe in like 15 seconds. And it also magically whisked the pod off to parts unknown so you didn’t even have to deal with that (I’m a bit chagrined to admit that, not being one to read the directions, I didn’t realize you weren’t supposed to peel the foil off the pod before you put it in – makes a but of a mess).

Anyhow, it wasn’t long after that I started seeing them for the home, and I’ve wanted one ever since. But then I quit drinking coffee, and while I still inexplicably wanted one, it seemed silly to get one and not use it. But now I have one cup in the morning, and it seems like that would be perfect. Not that I’d be throwing all those little plastic things into the landfill, of course. I’d get the reusable one and fill it with my own damn coffee.

But seeing as I already have a coffee maker that I bought to use during my summer in hell (aka, Washington DC) and my wife has her own coffee maker that she uses, and we actually have at least one more around here someplace, I can’t see spending $100+ on another one. And I don’t get how they can have three different cup sizes. I mean, it’s the same amount of coffee, no? You either get a small strong cup or a large watered-down one. Not sure I get it.

We have one at work. I’ve never used it, but they “coffee club” folks do, and for some reason, even though I don’t use the thing (frankly, I’ve only been in the break room where it’s located about two times in the past five years) I’m subjected to the e-mails about new coffee flavors and how people aren’t paying the $1 a cup or some people are bringing in their own pods but goddamn it are slopping up the supplies (supplies? What, like cream and sugar? Bleh – what a way to ruin a cup of coffee), and they need to pay, too, damnit!

This is why I don’t go to the break room – I’m afraid I’ll be frisked for contraband on my way out.

Oh well, time for a cup of :joe:

Be careful out there today.