I’ve been playing with Google’s new “timeline” feature, which (assuming you have location enabled on your phone, which I do) shows you where you’ve been (and for how long) on any given day. And if I didn’t realize what an exciting life I lead before, I certainly do now. Basically, it’s five days a week Home>Work>Home, then Home>Costco>Home, and Home>Home>Home. Sometimes I switch things up a bit and go to Costco on Sunday. Prior to January 16, there was also a 6 – 7 minute stop on the way home at the grocery store down in our village for beer every two or three days, and it has the trip I took to Minneapolis back over Thanksgiving weekend, plus when I went to my in-laws on Christmas Day. Mostly, though, it’s work and home, and home and work.

Yesterday, though, it has my trip to the vet with Fritzi (it even got the exact spot in the parking lot – just to the left of the big maple tree – where I parked, which is pretty impressive. I mean, when I check my location at home, they even get the room I’m in right – let’s face it, if Google ever decides to drone me, I’ve had it), and the fact that I was there for a total of 16 minutes.

I also noticed that Google has updated satellite photos – no older than mid-May or so. I can now see the piles of stone and mulch at my house, plus the little kiddie pool I had set up in the front yard for the dogs. From freakin’ space. I don’t know about you, but I think that’s pretty amazing.

So, anyhow, after our exciting trip to the vet yesterday, I came back home and decided to start painting the house. Or at least start getting ready to start painting the house. But then I said, “fuck that” and decided to do some weed whacking instead. So I did that for a while, and then thought about getting the power washer out to hose the house down a bit, but I didn’t feel like doing that, either. So I decided to start screwing the siding back on where it’s been coming off. So I did that for a while, but then had to get into some sort of bushes and a goddamn bee stung me (right on the earlobe, which is all swollen up so now I look like a Ferengi. Or half a Ferengi, anyway). And it hurt (it still hurts). I was googling around to see if there was some new remedy for bee stings (when I was a kid, the solution was to put mud on it, which my mom insisted would “draw” the stinger out), but the only thing I could find was a reassuring passage that said just ‘cuz you’ve never been allergic to bee stings before doesn’t mean you won’t be now. I was home alone with the dogs, so I thought “hey, this would be a great time to suddenly go into anaphylactic shock.” So instead of waiting to be found dead with my screw gun in my hand (so to speak), I said “fuck this” and hung out in the pool instead.

Sometimes, you just gotta admit defeat.

Of course, hanging out by the pool and not drinking beer gets pretty boring, pretty quick (much like everything else life when you remove beer from the equation), so I grabbed my camera and waited for the hummingbirds to show up. We have tons of them, but they tend to scurry away when you point a camera in their general direction.

The one with the red collar is particularly skittish – but one of these I’ll get him.

We’ve had a great stretch of rain-free weather which they say will end today, so I guess I’d better get out there and cut the grass. Or hang out in the pool – either one works for me. The secret to a happy life is being willing to settle.